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Saturday, May 31, 2003
Fucking Idiot
GOD DAMNIT I wish I hadn't done what I just did ... as soon as I hit enter on that IM, I felt both very selfish and very stupid; which one lasts longer will depend on the answer to the question I posed.
(Update: stupid won!)
Fuck, I'm a fucking dumbass. Who fucking needs a guy with this much baggage anyway. I keep swinging back and forth from thinking it's all (or mostly) in my imagination and I'm just blowing shit all out of proportion, thinking that it's even worse than I fear, and everything in between.
A very good friend was telling me recently:
And I really really really care
And I really really really want you
And I think I'm kinda scared
Cos I don't want to lose you
If you really really really care
Then maybe you can hang through
I hope you understand
It's nothing to you
My heart's at a low
I'm so much to manage
I think you should know that
I've been damaged
I'm falling in love
There's one disadvantage
I think you should know that I've been damaged
I hope you don't mind that I borrowed that, it really sums up how I'm feeling this morning. With that in mind, I'll quote someone else I (sorta) know: "Stupid me. Stupid freak me."
